Happy Valentines Day!!!

A day late, but it's the thought that counts....See what our patients have to say about Love.....

Silence

After months of silence, I break it tonight with a post from a friend.....

I have no real excuses as to why I've been silent for so long. Call it a writers block, call it exhaustion, call it, "I just don't know how to do this amazing place justice".....either way I admit it's been way too long.

Tonight I break it for a story that touched me and made me realize I've been selfish not to share what has been happening in my world. My world of patients, the wards, and the local nurses. There is a constant busyness to my days, and a flurry of my evenings---but I pledge from here on out to keep you all updated.

Please take a few minutes to read from my friend Amy's blog. She writes about Angelique a beautiful woman whom we have had the pleasure of doing life with for the last 2 months.

Enjoy Amy's brilliant words and captivating story telling here

Opportunity....

Thanksgiving is a time when we Americans cram around a table filled with family and friends and share a bird roasted for our occasion. The past two years Thanksgiving has looked differently to me, but this year was probably one of my favorites. This year will never leave my mind for the rest of my days. It was a crazy beautiful international mix of 16 of my friends crammed around a table on an outdoor terrace sharing an Indian feast. After the meal we went around sharing what we were thankful for. The list was long and included all the standard answers of family, friends,and health. It also included all the standard Mercy Ships answers of good coffee, nice chocolate, cheese, laundry detergent that smells nice, and all the other things this big white ship makes you miss about home.......but as I sat listening I couldn’t help but think what I was thankful for was more than all of that. Something so simple sounding at it’s core, but life altering in actuality. Opportunity was the one word answer that left my lips. I am thankful for the opportunities I have been given simply by where I was placed on the earth. This outreach I have had the absolute honor of leading the training program for local Congolese nurses. I have learned so much from these lovely ladies and have had my world view shaken on numerous occasions. They have taught me so many things just by spending time in their presence, and it has made me so incredibly thankful for everything I take for granted. I have never had to put the basic needs of my family up against the luxury of education. I have never had to decide if my money should be spent to get me to class on a big white ship or to provide lunch to my children. I have never had to go to work day after day knowing that even if I gave it my all I would still witness multiple deaths almost helpless to change the outcome because I simply didn’t have the education or the resources. I have been given opportunity after opportunity in this life considering it to be a “right”. Everyone deserves an opportunity to change their path, a chance to put a spin on their life to better themselves and change their ultimate outcome. I cannot explain the joy I feel knowing that I am in a position to pass the gift of opportunity on..... thank you for providing a way for me, for giving me the opportunity to be a part of this amazing organization.  

A letter from my "T"

This is a letter written by Thierno, if you have read my blog, then you know him as "T". If you don't know him, take a peak further down in my stories--he is a staple in my blog for almost all of Guinea..... This guy will forever be written on my heart. I miss him, and would give almost anything to see him again. To hear about how things are for him, and to try to beat him at a hand of cards....Take a minute to read the letter he wrote, It comes to you today from the Mercy Ships Canada page.

A letter from Thierno

Strong Work Media Team.....Strong Work!

So proud of the story this media team put together when they visited the ship at the beginning of our outreach in the Congo. I truly feel so blessed to be a part of this amazing stuff.....I love my life!! Click here for a glimpse at life on the Africa Mercy!

What does Love look like?

This is a question I’ve asked myself over and over in the last few weeks. I think I began asking myself the question only minutes after I received the call that I needed to come home. I thought about it a lot during my nearly 23 hour travel home, and it has consumed my thoughts late into the night after my Grandma has gone to bed. It’s popped into my mind as I look at her across the room sitting quietly in her chair, and it’s blaring as I pack up this life here again only to board another plane to Africa...... What does love look like? Does it look the same to everyone? Does it transcend all languages?  Does it have a universal symbol?

Love is something we all reach out for and crave, it’s what makes this great world spin and what our Father gave to us freely. We see it on billboards and commercials. We sing about it in songs, and plaster it on cards. The Beetles said that “All you need is love” and Ingrid Michaelson said that “love can pay the bills” For me, I have never had a deficit, not once. Even in my worst moments when I have felt alone, I have never ever been without love. I have been shown so much love in my lifetime by so many people, and have felt surrounded especially during this time with the loss of my Grandpa. 

In the last few weeks these are a few ways love has looked to me:

Love has looked like friends putting important tasks and jobs to a screeching halt and staying up half the night so that I wouldn’t have to be alone. It’s listening and crying alongside a friend even when you can’t find the right words. It’s being handed freshly made cups of coffee in between meetings, and it was in the room when I came back after a long day of organizing my departure to find my laundry done and folded. It was there as I was given one last “see you later” hug only to be handed a bag of snacks thoughtfully packed for a long plane ride. It’s in the notes quietly slipped between clothes only to be discovered once my feet were back on American soil. It’s text messages and phone calls across the oceans and across state lines. It’s a handmade card in the mail from a dear friend far away. It’s driving hours one way to be there on a hard day. It’s a best friend dropping all her plans at the last minute in order to cram all proper fall activities into one day. Love is staying up late to just “be” next to a beloved friend and waking up early in order to fit one more cup of coffee into the day......

To my Grandma love looks like cleaning kitchen cabinets and sleeping in her bed so that she doesn’t have to be alone. It’s holding together the pieces for her when her heart was just torn in half. It’s being there every moment of every day as she figures out her new life. It’s being the reminder to take medication when that is the last thing on your mind.  It’s being present when the other part of you has gone missing, and you know that it’s never coming back. It’s making noise, in a house that soon will be far too quiet after spending 56 years in it with the love of your life.

If you put 10 people in a room and asked them to describe love, they may all give different answers. The answers could be simple, flowery, poetic or funny depending on your crowd, but for me;  Love is practical, Love takes time, Love is being present, and Love can transform your life.  It’s thoughtful, generous, and time consuming. It’s putting yourself out there and expecting nothing in return. It’s wonderful to receive and even better to give. It’s in the bigger things, but it’s also in the smaller gestures. It’s in the actions that make the other person pause and reflect, grateful for the people they have surrounded themselves with and the life they have formed.......Love will always win, Love is all around us, and I think I agree with the Beetles.....Love is all we need.

Unexpected

I’ve put this blog off for days--2 weeks in fact........ I’ve finally slowed, and have forced myself to put some words on paper. I don’t know exactly what to say, but I know that I need to explain my long absence. I had to leave the Africa Mercy for awhile, and today 16 days after I arrived home, two weeks after he died, and one week after we laid him to rest, I write this sitting in my Grandpa’s chair. 

On July 22nd, my 25th birthday, one of our worst fears came to be. The pain in my Grandpa’s ribs that we had talked about for 2 weeks was more than just an ache. He had bone cancer in multiple spots the worst of which was in his back. I was at the very end of six amazing weeks at home, and the next day I was due to go back to the Africa Mercy. It was a horrible night of contemplation, but based on him saying, “now Hannah, you ARE getting on that plane tomorrow and you WILL go and help people” I went. The next day I boarded a plane and met the ship to sail into the Republic of Congo for another field service. The last two and a half months have been off and on, one step forward and two steps back. I have talked to my Mom almost every day getting updates on what was happening with Grandpa. As time went on we had small victories and major setbacks. It was horrible to watch my family struggle from another continent. Helpless was the word I used most to describe my feelings. It was consuming, and insanely difficult. We always left each conversation with me asking, “Do you need me?” and my Mom always replying, “Not yet Boo...not yet”.  Many doctors appointments, radiation treatments, a feeding tube, home oxygen and several transfusions later I received the phone call that I knew deep inside me would eventually come no matter how much I prayed it wouldn’t. Grandpa was ill, and It was time for me to come home. Only after all we had battled through, this one hit my family like a 90mph curve ball---my grandpa had suffered a devastating stroke while in hospital. We didn’t see it coming, and there was no way for us to anticipate this twist.  It didn’t look recoverable, and over the phone at two am locked in my friends bathroom, my family and I had those horrible end of life conversations that no one ever wants to have. In a little over 48 hours I filled out all the paperwork, handed over my job educating the local nurses, said goodbye to my amazing friends, took one last ride through Pointe Noire and boarded a plane home. The 22 hours of flying time were some of the longest. Finding a place for internet at the airports, waiting for that message, unsure of whether I would make it home in time. I arrived back on US soil the 13th, my Brother and Dad picked me up, and we drove straight to the hospital. I got in at 7:15pm.  Jet lagged, greasy, and emotional I went to see him.... 

I had 24 hours with my Grandpa before he passed. He was not conscious any of those hours, but it was a time for me to just be with him. To tell him stories of the Congo, reminisce about all those times we had while I was growing up, and share with him my deep love for him. To tell him that it was okay for him to go be with Jesus, and assure him that we would all take care of Grandma. It was so difficult, but a beautiful time for my family to surround him. It was incredible that during his entire illness, he never had to spend the night alone. He had someone with him around the clock. He was loved so deeply, and it was evident during his last days how greatly he was cared for. How many lives he had impacted, and how well he had raised a family. My Grandpa went to be with Jesus on Monday October 14th with 6 of his surrounding his bed. We wept together, and as he left this world we knew that he was going somewhere far greater than here.  For the next week we camped out at my Grandma’s. Supporting one another, mourning together, sorting through photos, and just celebrating the life of one of the greatest men I have ever known. My Grandpa was a proud man, and he constantly made me laugh. He was famous for his printed T-shirts with clever sayings, his sandals that left permanent tan lines on his feet, and his 2 sweaters that he had worn for the last 20+years. He was known for his glory days in the Barber Shop quartet, his many years behind the meat counter at the grocery store he owned, and his 25+years working for Pitney Bowes. He will be remembered for his ridiculous ability to rig anything with a rubber band and a paper clip, his affinity for tarp straps, and his jokes. He will be remembered for his amazing cooking, his love for motorcycle trips, his proud service to the military,and his use of the saying “simmer down” to his giggling grandchildren. He will be remembered for his incredible ability to remember dates, his long stories, his love for fishing and his hilarious emails. He taught me to save, to take care of what I had, to re-use things. He taught me loyalty and how to honor those you love. He taught me how to serve with zeal, and that you should always give to another human. He was highly regarded by all who knew him, and he will be so deeply missed. There is a definite hole in my heart, and I really can’t believe that he’s gone. His life is permanently ingrained in my soul, and who I am today is in so many ways because of him.....It won’t make sense to any of you, but as far back as I can remember he always said it to me, and I always knew it...... “I love you bushels, pecks, heapy gobs, and more and more too”.

I love you Grandpa, and I can’t wait to meet you again one day.........